Wednesday 20 November 2013

Life isn’t about Xbox one, it is about Kinnection!

The Xbox One Kinect is an incredible thing. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to take matters into my own hands when playing a video game.

“If I didn’t have to rely on these buttons so damn much” I frequently grumble, “I’d grab that monster and kick it in myself!”

For example: the fat bloke from Pokemon. In every single version of that game, there’s some fat chug blocking your way until you’ve done something he wants you to do. If a fat bloke did that in real life, I know that I for one would be first in line to smack him in the gob. We’re not that violent as a society, but we’re busy, y’know?

Maybe that’s what Team Rocket are so pissed off about? Maybe we’ve misjudged them all these years…Maybe they just got sick of fat blokes, people with spurious stomach-aches and Snorlax after bleedin’ Snorlax blocking their progress. Team Rocket are cat lovers, no harm ever came from cat lovers, did it?

Well, with the Kinect, your body is the controller. When you’re boxing or fighting, its your own fist you’re swinging, when you’re running, its your own legs you’re pumping. Now, the Xbox one with kinect bundle is putting all of these great things in one place, making it easier than ever to get playing the greatest gaming innovation since Sonic 2 allowed you to push down and ‘B’ in order to get up hills without running all the way back where you came from.

That’s right, the Xbox one with kinect bundle is the future of gaming technology. You can, at last, take matters into your own hands. You can at last use your reflexes and natural instincts rather than relying on controllers and other peripherals. Yep, the future is here and its Kinect-shaped…I know what you geeks are thinking, because I’m thinking it too, we’re one step closer to the invention of the Holodeck…Yay! 


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